Is It That Obvious?

It's been awhile since I sat down here and typed about anything. Mostly, I've just posted some stupid stories that I found amusing for whatever reason. But Saturday finally gave me enough inspiration to sit down here and click away at my keyboard. Of course, just about any trip up to Vancouver, BC inspires me to write (haha). It's no secret that I absolutely love that city. For whatever reason, something there just clicks with me. So it's easy for me to write about it. Of course, it'll still take me at least a couple of hours to complete this task. But it'll still be worth it.

The whole story started about two weeks ago. At the December 2nd game up in Everett, I had purchased a ticket to the Silvertips/Thunderbirds game on the 17th. Sometime that next week, Kurt gave me a call and told me that he had bought two tickets for the Giants/Winterhawks game up in Vancouver for the same day. The idea, he told me, was that the second ticket was for me. At first, I told him that I had already bought that ticket for Everett and I wouldn't be able to go. But after thinking about it for a couple hours, I figured that since I didn't have any games in Vancouver on my schedule for this season, this was a perfect opportunity to head up there. So I emailed him back and told him to count me in.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Kurt met me at my apartment at 9:00am. He dropped his car off in my parking lot and we took my car up there. He had originally offered to drive up there. But I told him I would since a) he had worked late the night before and would be pretty tired and b) he had drove us up there last year. The drive up to the border was pretty normal. Just cruising along listening to rock & roll at fairly high volumes.

While we were waiting in line at the border (a line which wasn't as long as I had expected on a Saturday at noon), these two hippies walked over to the grass to our left and held up a large sign connected to two posts that they held which read something to the effect of not using anymore "Minutemen" to patrol the border. For those not in the know, as far as I can recall the story, there have been these people who live on our side of the border lately who have taken it upon themselves to try to stop people from smuggling the ever-popular BC Bud into the United States. And, evidently, the American Government has been turning their heads the other way while they do this. Frankly, I have nothing against this practice. It's well known that I think hash should be legalized since I feel that it would cut down on alot of crime and help empty out our jails a little bit. But it's still illegal. So if the government won't do anything about it, why not let the citizens? And, of course, it didn't suprise me that the two guys holding up that sign looked like they had sampled the ol' hippie lettuce earlier in the day.

Also while we were waiting in line, Kara gave us a call. She was all stoked about being able to go to the Coyote Ugly there in San Antonio. I think she was trying to make us jealous or something. I didn't have the heart to tell her that they not only have something similar to that up in Seattle (Cowgirls Inc.), but also down here only about 200 yards from where I live (The Lady Luck Saloon). But it was still nice hearing from her. And, of course, I can't wait to see her back on leave here on New Year's Eve! That'll be great!!!

The girl in the booth who takes your id's and stuff seemed pretty slow. I think it was mostly just due to boredom. But she still asked all the usual questions. And then let us go on our way.

Our first stop in Canada (as always) was at the cash exchange shop. There were two clerks at the desk and we were the only ones in there. So we each took a window. We each gave them $60. Kurt got done first and started putting his cash back in his wallet. Then, as my clerk was counting out my money ($74 and change), Kurt spoke up. "Wait a minute....you gave her $60, right"? I answered "yeah". "And you're getting $74 back, right"? Again I said "yeah". "Okay...I also gave $60, but I only got $64 back". I turned around and looked at the clerk. She looked at her computer, typed something in and said "oops. I'm sorry". So now, with my honest way's kicking in, I gave my $74 and change back to her so she could give me the correct $64. I shook my fist and cursed Kurt even before we left the store (jokingly, of course). He told me he was sorry and that he shouldn't have said anything. As a peace offering, he told me he would buy me a beer later on. So I forgave him on the spot (lol).

So it was on towards downtown Vancouver. Robson street traffic really wasn't all that bad at the time. But the sidewalks were packed with Christmas shoppers. I parked the car in the usual garage just off the corner of Robson and Bute. And even though we knew about it before we got there, we still paused for a moment of silence in rememberance of the now-closed Hooters. Ah, the memories of that place. Kurt's undercooked buffalo shrimp last year comes to mind. Also, the fact that they made just about the best fish & chips I've ever tasted will be missed. But come on...we all know what the best memory of the place is. It took place during our infamous "Fear and Loathing" trip up there back in November of 2003. It was the "Tom & Tom" show clicking along at it's best (or worst...depending on your point of view). While we were in there, all they were playing was rap music. After about 15 minutes of this, Tom W waved his hand at the waitress, motioning her to come over to our table. "Is there something I can do for you" she asked. Tom replied "yeah....can you play something white"?

Since we were the only ones in the place at the time, they did flip the music over to the oldies station where, ironically, they were playing"I'll Be There" by the Four Tops. But the lines infamous place is still well-intact. And probably will be for as long as I'm alive. Even if it was just about the worst Hooters I've ever been to, the joint will still be missed just for that reason alone.

So having to find a new place to hang out on Robson Street (and finding a place so Kurt could take a piss), we decided on this bar called "Fogg & Suds". There weren't many people in there when we arrived. But, then again, it was only about 12:30 at the time. So we bellied up to the bar and ordered our beer. And, just for the record, Kurt did pay me back (lol). We sat there at the bar chatting with the bartender (who had one of the thickest Canadian accents you'll ever come across and also gave me a free basket of fries) and another fellow while watching the Giants/Chiefs NFL game on the tv. Eventually, there was another employee who came to work wearing a Vancouver Giants Gilbert Brule jersey. It turns out that he was a Giants season ticket holder. And we sat there with him chatting away about the Giants, Winterhawks and the rest of the WHL for quite awhile. After spending almost three hours in there, we agreed on our way out that "Fogg & Suds" is gonna be our new hangout while in Vancouver.

So it was onto Robson Street to walk around for awhile. We walked down a few blocks, occasionally taking a trip into a shop to take a look at some over-priced items. Of course, we ogled and drooled at all the girls who we knew wouldn't even give us the time of day (lol). Eventually, we got to a point where we decided to turn around and head back. But when we looked across the street, we noticed that there was a crowd gathered around the art museum. At first, Kurt didn't seem too interested in what was happening over there. But dammit, there was a crowd over there and I just had to see what it was all about. When we got there, in the center of everything, there was a man standing there in a straight jacket. It turns out he was kind of a stand-up Houdini. He told us that he was from Great Britain (which was pretty obvious from his accent). He also begged for money alot (cash only...he didn't want any coins). His reasoning for this was "the more money you give me, the more money I'll have". My favorite line was said during one of his first attempts at getting out of his jacket. He told everyone to clap in unison while he jumped up and down trying to get out of it. So the crowd did and he jumped along to the rythem. Of course, as usually happens when crowds clap together, the beat starts coming at a more rapid pace. When it did, he stopped and said "I said clap together, not faster you idiots". Even insults towards the crowd like that brought laughter. At one point, he even told us to flip off the people on the bus passing behind us. And some people did.

Eventually he got out of the jacket. As Kurt and I were leaving, the last things I heard coming out of his mouth were more plea's for money...cash only.

We still had some time to kill. So we decided to head back onto Cambie Street and go to the Oakridge Mall. We weren't looking to buy anything there. Mostly we just wanted to kill more time and find another place to take a leak. But on our lap around the place, we couldn't find any restrooms. Just as we were about to give it up, I found one of those maps of the mall. I went over to it and started looking. I didn't even notice that there was a woman standing next to it in a Santa hat. "Are you looking for anything in particular" she asked. Without hesitation, I said "yes...a bathroom". She laughed and pointed at the back of the drug store that we were just outside of. So we weaved our way through there, did what we had to do, and headed back out to the car.

Along the way to the PNE, we hit the end of a street. And the only way to turn was right. So I went ahead and turned left there and then another left at the next light. But again, this was another street that doesn't hook up with Renfrew (the street that the PNE is on along with Hastings). I started getting a little suspicious after a few miles and decided to take a left turn. It turns out that this was a smart idea. I noticed that the lit-up ski resort on Grouse Mountain was a little further to the west than I had remembered. So we took a couple more turns and headed back up north until we got to Hastings. It turns out that I was right. But the cool thing was that we were only about two or three blocks from where we were supposed to be. So really, in the end, we only lost about 5 minutes or so.

Things went a little south when we got to the parking lot. The price to park there is $6.50. Why they charge the extra 50 cents is anyone's guess. So when we got to the booth, trying to get rid of as much of the Canadian money that we could, Kurt and I started fishing around in our pokets trying to slap together $6.50 in coins. While fumbling around like a couple fools, the girl in the booth said "you guys are from the States, huh"? I kinda guffawed and replied "is it that obvious"? She chuckled a little and said "yes it is". Eventually, we slapped the money together, got our little ticket and parked the car.

While we were waiting in line at the will-call window, a man asked his son (probably somewhere around 7 or 8) what the name of the team was on the jersey I was wearing. I always wear my old Joe Sakic Quebec Nordiques sweater up there. It almost always gets alot of love (unlike my Jackman Blues jersey I wore there a couple years ago. Some lessons are best learned the hard way). But the kid had no clue. So I decided to change the question a little bit in the hopes that he would be able to correctly answer it. I took my Seahawks jacket off and asked him if he knew the first name of the guy who's jersey it was. I heard his mom feed him the answer, but I still slapped him 5 when he answered "Joe". Then his little sister (about a year or two younger) closed her jacket up and asked me what was on her shirt. She didn't cover up a star on it, so I thought for a second and answered "All-Star"? She said "Nope" and then revealed to me that it said "State Champions". Her dad then said "even though that's kinda hard to do up here in the Provinces". That didn't stop her, though. "My soccer team is called the Maniacs. And we NEVER lose". I popped my eyes open and said "wow! You must be an all-star then". She then reached in her pocket and pulled out what looked like a picture."Here. You can have this" she said as she handed it to me. It turned out to be a little notepad with a snow monkey on it. Her mom bent down to her and said "wow...that's a really nice thing to do". I waited for a second for her mom to look back up at me. When she did, she gave me a little nod. So I knew that accepting this gift was alright. Then I said "well thank you. I will definitely remember you for this and, next time I see you, I'll have something to give you in return".

Of course I won't (lol). The chances of me seeing her again are pretty slim. But I was still touched by her gesture. Eventually,the dad got their tickets (they were another slow bunch at the will-call window) and we waved good-bye to each other.

Now as for what all happened while we were inside...well...most of that is gonna have to go unsaid. It's not that anything particularly bad happened or anything. It's just that one of the participants who we ran into there wanted annonimity. And as is known well-ahead of time, I won't write about anything on here that people don't want out in the open. Which in this case is probably a good thing (lol). The things that Kurt and I were exposed to were, at the very least, unsettling. Other words that come to mind are unsavory, uncomfortable, bizarre, sleazy, unwanted information, etc. And we'll jump ahead here and just say that it pretty much dominated the conversation in the car on the way home. So this is one of those rare instances that I have to say "what happened in Vancouver is gonna stay in Vancouver".

Sorry kids.

The game itself was odd. For the first 52 minutes, the two teams were locked-up in a 0-0 tie. Then Vancouver scored the first goal. Then the second. Then the third. Then the fourth. Then the fifth. By the time it was over, the Giants had a 5-0 victory over Portland. To me, I would compare the Winterhawks in this game to a boxer with a glass jaw. They hung around for awhile. But once that first big punch landed, they were staggered enough that they couldn't come back to mount any fight.

And so the race for 2nd place in the US Division continues to stumble along. With Portland, Seattle and Spokane all within 2 points of that spot, not a single one can win a game to save their lives at this point. And first place Everett isn't fairing much better, either.

And that's about that. Not much happened the rest of the way home. The only real thing of note was that getting back into the States was more normal this time. The guard asked a few more questions than they did last time. But we still got through. All-in-all it was a great time. Once again, I survived the lunacy that is Vancouver traffic (always a victory in my book). We found a cool new hangout, a greedy street performer, a cool family and we got through what could have been a potentially embarrassing situation (lol).

Not bad for one day!